Wonders of the Universe

We've all heard the questions, "Why are we here? What came first, the chicken or the egg? and one of my favorites, If a tree falls in the forest with no one around, does it make a sound?"

Hold on to your knickers, dentures and taupes, my brother asked a question at lunch last week that gave me pause. Why doesn't our own snoring wake us up? I should be embarrassed to admit this but my snoring could open windows, cut down half a rain forest and wake the Catarsians on the planet Catarsa on the far side of the galaxy. It woke my husband every night and every girl scout at Camp Wildwood. I still have my tonsils and one night I snored with such force, my tonsils inflated like an inside-out balloon, waking me only when my air supply got cut off. I now use a C-PAP machine for sleep apnea and I no longer snore.

I thought about his question and I answered that maybe we are immune to our own noise just as most people are unable to smell themselves. (I personally have a hard time believing someone is unaware of their stench after being sprayed by a mad skunk.) I guess that is a topic that can stand on its' own.

Until next time bath often, wear a muffler if you snore and watch out for sleep deprived Catarsians (I started using my C-PAP machine a couple of years ago but it takes awhile to travel from Catarsa to Earth)

Talking Dogs

If you are a dog owner or know someone who is, you'll be able to relate to this.

Have you ever found yourself talking out loud to your faithful companion? I'm not referring to your spouse, life partner or best friend, I'm talking canine. I talk to my beloved Angel or Gabriel I often look in their eyes and wonder what they would say if they had the gift of gab. Angel would no doubt demand we send the little interloper on his way, that he'd outstayed his welcome the day he arrived. Gabriel would probably tell us all about seeing the world for the first time or that he's sorry he didn't tell us he had to go before leaving a pile or puddle on the floor.

Remember some years back there was a collar advertised from China or Japan that claimed to tell you what your dog was saying by interpreting his bark. You programed the collar as to your dog's breed, temperament etc, and in turn when your dog barked the collar would tell you what the dog was saying to you. I guess it didn't catch on because I haven't seen one in years. Of course, you can always call the pet psychic or the dog whisperer to translate what your canine wants you to know. I myself only need to look into their faces. Eyes, mouth, tongue, tail and general stance tell me everything I need to hear. Until next time, talk about the universe and meaning of life with your dog friend, but don't let him have the last bark.

Sibling Rivalry

Being an only child living on a farm my husband never experienced sibling rivalry. I am the youngest of three and the only girl. There was more rivalry between my brothers than between them and me. Our daughter is an only child so she has never experienced sibling rivalry. As a child she often asked why she didn't have any brothers or sisters. I would say, "Your Daddy and I wanted more children but that's not the way things turned out." Truth be told, as a new mom at 34 I probably wouldn't have survived another one. It took all my wits and energy to raise her. Her growing years is a blog on its' own. More to come on that one.

Now that we are empty nester's we are experiencing sibling rivalry between our two dogs. Angel was an older puppy when my husband found her on the side of the road some 11 years ago. Gabriel is a retriever pup we added to our home this past September. For Angel it was hate at first bite. For Gabriel being the five month old he was, it was love at first lick. The more Gabriel tried to be friends, the grouchier Angel became.

The first few days were tricky. We didn't trust Angel alone with Gabe much like parents don't trust a two year old with a newborn. Having Gabriel has brought out the puppy in Angel. Angel never cared for toys. Gabriel loves them. I didn't see it as unusual for Gabe to pick up his favorite stuffed fox and shake it in Angel's face. It boggled my mind to see Angel pick-up the same toy later on and shake it in Gabe's face. If Gabriel wants it, so does Angel. If I pay attention to Angel, Gabe pushes in and vice-vesa. As I write this Gabe is laying with his head under my recliner. Angel is directly in front with Gabe's purple doll under her paw. I'm surprised my cat Izzy hasn't come over to snuggle next to me. I guess he doesn't feel like being harassed. Some day this cycle will repeat itself when Angel is chasing squirrels across the Rainbow Bridge and we bring another pup into our lives to entertain Gabriel. Until next time eat all the apple pie a-la-mode you want, it's only fruit and mild after all.

Won't You Be My Neighbor

Do you remember Mr. Roger's Neighborhood? How he sang about wanting you to be his neighbor. With the development and rampant spread of sites like Facebook, My Space and Twitter, the entire community of Earth, at least those with internet access, can be neighbors. Every time you add a friend to Facebook it shows you everyone that new friend knows, so you can ask if they want to be your friend. Now I'm not a mathematical genius, but doesn't it stand to reason that eventually the chain of invitations and friendships will make it around the globe?

And what about the use of sites like YouTube to share yourself and views with the world at large. You can be funny, relevant or irrelevant, quirky, down beat or just plain gross. Anything goes in this day and age. Stars and celebs use Twitter to announce weddings, divorces, babies, etc. Where do people find the time to Facebook, Twitter and the like, I guess I could if I turned off Spider Solitaire. Well I'll catch you all on Facebook or skype. Until next time, keep your panties from getting into a wad and relax with one of my cranberry liqueur cocktails.

Ringing in the New Year

My Christmas letter this year was titled, Ritchie's Center for Home Improvements. In the letter I spoke about adding six feet to the house, four feet on our new puppy Gabriel and two feet on Alexander, our new honorary grandson next door. What I didn't mention were all the sports venues we added. Once upon a time, only the rich and famous could afford tennis courts, bowling alleys and movie theaters in their homes, now with the power of Wii ordinary folk like myself can have the same and more. We have a tennis court, baseball field, several 18 hole golf courses, putt-putt, a firing range, bowling alley and a track where you can ride a cow around an obstacle course. Now all I need is a gym with a personal trainer, wait, I have that too on the Wii Fitness Plus. Happy New Year to all. I promise to be more faithful in adding posts this coming year. It is one of my many pleasures.

Winning

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I bought a Wii for Christmas. The mii's that play the games with you give facial expressions as they win or lose. Winning miis jump up and down, raising their arms up over their heads. If you lose, your mii hangs their head and shakes it back and forth.

I figure, I win even if I lose. I'm up and moving, burning calories and firming muscles wheather I win the actual game or not. I've gotten to be a pretty good bowler on the Wii. I bowled a 247 game last week, something I never did when I was in the bowling league years ago. I wonder if I would do as well if I dusted off my 14 pound ball and went up to the bowling alley ? Oh, well if you hear on the news that a crazy redhead in Florida through her bowling ball backwards through the concession stand, you'll know my ball was too heavy for my fingers to hold on to. Remember, if you can't hit the kingpin, make sure your miss is spectacular.

Empty Nesters Syndrome

My husband and I have entered a new phase in our lives. We are officially, Empty Nester's. Our one and only daughter gleefully went off to college this past August leaving us in her dust. She hasn't stopped since. When friends and family ask how she is doing, they are not surprised she is making excellent grades but they are surprised that she has yet to be homesick. Then they ask how we are adjusting to our new life style. Again they are pleasantly surprised to hear that we are doing well. My husband continues his work with the Henry Nehrling Society and watching the stock market while I have started volunteering two mornings a week at a local elementary school. We also have a young family living in our Mother-in-law apartment. I have had the best time playing Honorary Grandma to their two year old.

Do I miss my sweet girl? Absolutely. Am I pining away with a bottle of Wild Turkey in one hand and a Napoleon in the other? No. After all, isn't it the goal to raise our children to go forth and forge their own lives? The fact she wanted to go out of state to college and is excelling tells me we did a great job getting her ready for adulthood. I have no doubt she will make her mark on the world. Her fourth grade teacher told me, "She's going to invent something big some day." I have no doubt she will and her dad and I will be right there telling all the embarrousing baby stories we can remember.